Good advice for adult children of divorce

Originally posted on WisdomForLife:

In his helpful book, “Breaking the Cycle of Divorce: How your marriage can succeed even if your parents’ didn’t,” Dr. John Trent suggested that adult children of divorce (ACOD) face daunting challenges in both life and marriage.

“Statistically, studies have shown that children of divorce suffer from more depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, feelings of rejection, drug and alcohol abuse, delinquency, poor inter-personal relationships, and criminality than children from intact homes. Sixty-five percent of children from divorced families will never build a good post-divorce relationship with their fathers. Thirty percent will be unable to build a good post divorce relationship with their mothers”

Most ACOD are resolved to have strong and lasting marriages. But, as Dr. Trent says, they live with a “nagging fear that your marriage will fail — just as your parents’ marriage did.”

As an ACOD himself, Dr. Trent offers 10 helpful points for people who never had the benefit…

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Conflict and Unity in the Church

Originally posted on WisdomForLife:

The story is not a pleasant one when a Church becomes a center of conflict instead of love. Yet the story is not exceptional either as many of our letters in the New Testament reveal.

I smile when people say they wish they could just get back to the way it was in the New Testament Church. Sometimes I ask, “Which one?” 

Start with the earliest expression depicted through the letter we call “James.” What was happening that James had to write, “What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you?” (James 4:1). A survey of the book reveals less than calm circumstances in the Church.

Move forward a little to the Churches of Galatia. Imagine how bad it had become for the apostle to write, “If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other” (Galatians…

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What does maturity look like?

Originally posted on WisdomForLife:

In a class I teach for singles on how to make the marriage decisions one of your best decisions, we invest significant time discussing the importance of maturity to a good relationship. 

When I ask the class to describe maturity and immaturity, I encourage them to first examine their own lives before applying anything to others.

We are wise to focus on becoming the person that your future spouse will need and be blessed with.

I also remind them that behaviors, perspectives and life-patterns rarely appear without a history behind them. Looking closely and honestly at the history is essential to breaking patterns that get passed through generations. 

Consider the following characteristics of maturity and use the list for conversation. It’s obviously not an exhaustive description of a mature person, but it offers a starting point.

Ask yourself and others how you would go about learning whether a potential…

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10 common satanic behaviors

Originally posted on WisdomForLife:

After doing an in-depth study of the three places in Scripture where we find the voice of the devil speaking directly to someone else, I became convinced that many people look for the Devil in the wrong places.

This becomes even more clear when we observe how Scripture explicitly mentions Satan with reference to the ten characteristics below.

People rarely associate many of these behaviors with the evil one. Yet how do we explain the truth that, “the whole world is under the control of the evil one” (I John 5:19)?

It seems likely that his ways would be pervasively noticed throughout the world. And, in fact, we find this to be the case when we consider how common these ten characteristics are to human history.

  1. Conceit: (I Timothy 3:6)
  2. Willful rebellion: (Gen. 4:1-14 – observed in Cain – who belonged to the evil one; I John 3:12; cf…

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A truth we must accept

Originally posted on WisdomForLife:

God is merciful to reach out to rebellious creatures and He makes significant concessions to meet us where we live. His justice makes these concession necessary and His mercy makes them possible.

Should this truth affect the way we view the Bible?

Since the Bible addresses people and times that are violent and evil, we should not be surprised to find some really horrible things in it. The entire human race exists under the merciful concession of God. 

The fact of God’s concession started early in history and it set the tone for the ways of God with humanity. If we don’t pause long over this fact, we’ll likely misunderstand God and then misread the rest of the story of God’s dealings with humanity in the Bible.

Look closely at the way God’s concession is explained after God brought cataclysmic judgment against humans for evil early in human history.

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Two Great Songs for Worship and a Prayer

Originally posted on WisdomForLife:

I love songs with real messages centered in truth with deep gospel clarity! 

“Lord Jesus, give me a deeper repentance, a horror of sin, a dread of its approach. Help me purely to flee it and jealously to resolve that my heart shall be Yours alone. Give me a deeper trust, that I may lose myself to find myself in You, the ground of my rest, the spring of my being. Give me a deeper knowledge of Yourself as Savior, Master, Lord, and King. Give me deeper power in private prayer, more sweetness in Your Word, more steadfast grip on its truth. Give me deeper holiness in speech, thought, action, and let me not seek moral virtue apart from You.”

“Plough deep in me, great Lord, heavenly Cultivator of hearts, that my being may be a tilled field, the roots of grace spreading far and wide, until You alone are…

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