Category Archives: Dysfunctional

The girl who never measured up

Posted on January 3, 2022 by Wisdomforlife

A sad story that goes to the heart of the concerns I wrote about in my book, “The 18 Year Factor – How our upbringing affects our lives and relationships.” Continue reading →

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God’s chosen ones – severely dysfunctional!

Posted on May 11, 2021 by Wisdomforlife

These people were messed up! This family history was severely dysfunctional! Did God ever pause and ask why He chose them? Be careful. We might need to ask the same question about… Continue reading →

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A distant father

Posted on November 5, 2019 by Wisdomforlife

If she displayed to others what he thought to be right and good, then she would receive approval from her dad. As long as she pretended to be the obedient, respectful child, she was accepted. She grew up in hypocrisy, not knowing her father’s love. He was absent emotionally, and to this day, Lindy does not know him, though she still clearly hears his disapproval. Continue reading →

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Hiding something behind her eyes

Posted on July 24, 2019 by Wisdomforlife

Ever notice what people reveal with their eyes? Eyes can communicate things about life and the inner self. Continue reading →

Posted in 18 Year factor, Dysfunctional, Sexual Abuse, Sexual Assault, Wisdom | Tagged , | 1 Comment

Verbal abuse and appearance bullying

Posted on June 26, 2019 by Wisdomforlife

Consider why childhood verbal abuse and appearance bullying often cast a long shadow over adult lives and make adult relationships difficult.
Continue reading →

Posted in 18 Year factor, Appearance bullying, Broken Relationships, Child Abuse, Dysfunctional, Pride, Relationships, Wisdom | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Four kinds of children from dysfunctional homes

Posted on June 23, 2019 by Wisdomforlife

Let me introduce you to the four kinds of children in relation to differences in reaction to a dysfunctional home. Continue reading →

Posted in 18 Year factor, Abuse, Child Abuse, Dysfunctional, Parenting, Wisdom | Tagged , | 1 Comment

How childhood experiences become enemies of true love

Posted on June 14, 2019 by Wisdomforlife

Fear and control function as a kind of glue that cements past and present with a strong potential of ruining the future. Continue reading →

Posted in 18 Year factor, Child Abuse, Dysfunctional, Family life, Parenting, Parenting Groups, Parenting teens, Wisdom | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

The Self-blame trap

Posted on May 18, 2019 by Wisdomforlife

Self-blame, a toxic effect of a troubled 18-year factor, is often the basis for a self-limiting belief system children carry from their traumatic experiences into adulthood. Continue reading →

Posted in 18 Year factor, Abuse, Child Abuse, Dysfunctional, Wisdom | Tagged | 1 Comment

Summer reading worth your time

Posted on April 26, 2019 by Wisdomforlife

“I did not want to disappoint others so I created a false image of myself. I tried to look normal on the outside when everything within me was chaotic.” Continue reading →

Posted in 18 Year factor, Child Abuse, Christian Counselor, Counseling, Dysfunctional, Family life, Wisdom | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

A quiet domineering father (Lisa’s story)

Posted on April 12, 2019 by Wisdomforlife

My father was often quiet, but a stern look or gesture from him conveyed so much danger to me. I was always afraid of setting him off — even though he never hit us or anything like that. It seems difficult to understand how someone can rule with fear without actually doing anything. But I lived in fear of him. Continue reading →

Posted in 18 Year factor, Abuse, Dysfunctional, Fathers, Wisdom | Tagged , | 1 Comment