Category Archives: Abuse

How did your upbringing affect you?

Have you ever thought about how your upbringing affected you? Did you come from a healthy and stable home? Most people don’t reflect deeply on the way they’ve been affected by what I call the 18-year factor.   Your 18-year … Continue reading

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Four kinds of children from dysfunctional homes

Let me introduce you to the four kinds of children in relation to differences in reaction to a dysfunctional home. Continue reading

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Being a victim but rejecting a victim’s mentality

A woman in her early forties acknowledged that she finally began to overcome the effects of growing up in a violent home when… Continue reading

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Looking back to move ahead

1. True or False? Most people understand that their upbringing affects their lives.
2. True or false? – Most people understand how (and how much) their upbringing affects their lives. Continue reading

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The Self-blame trap

Self-blame, a toxic effect of a troubled 18-year factor, is often the basis for a self-limiting belief system children carry from their traumatic experiences into adulthood. Continue reading

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A quiet domineering father (Lisa’s story)

My father was often quiet, but a stern look or gesture from him conveyed so much danger to me. I was always afraid of setting him off — even though he never hit us or anything like that. It seems difficult to understand how someone can rule with fear without actually doing anything. But I lived in fear of him. Continue reading

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Hurt by a distant father (Julie’s story)

Julie was baffled by unexplainable outbursts of anger and an almost continual feeling of discontentment — even though she was married to a loving, supportive husband and had four beautiful children. Continue reading

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