Category Archives: Abuse

A distant father

If she displayed to others what he thought to be right and good, then she would receive approval from her dad. As long as she pretended to be the obedient, respectful child, she was accepted. She grew up in hypocrisy, not knowing her father’s love. He was absent emotionally, and to this day, Lindy does not know him, though she still clearly hears his disapproval. Continue reading

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Pick one line and share it

Some key lines from “The 18-Year Factor” by Steve Cornell ● Attachments to a painful past make it difficult to do well in the present. ● The narrow lens of yesterday’s loss doesn’t have to control the way you see … Continue reading

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How did your upbringing affect you?

Have you ever thought about how your upbringing affected you? Did you come from a healthy and stable home? Most people don’t reflect deeply on the way they’ve been affected by what I call the 18-year factor.   Your 18-year … Continue reading

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Four kinds of children from dysfunctional homes

Let me introduce you to the four kinds of children in relation to differences in reaction to a dysfunctional home. Continue reading

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Being a victim but rejecting a victim’s mentality

A woman in her early forties acknowledged that she finally began to overcome the effects of growing up in a violent home when… Continue reading

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Looking back to move ahead

1. True or False? Most people understand that their upbringing affects their lives.
2. True or false? – Most people understand how (and how much) their upbringing affects their lives. Continue reading

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The Self-blame trap

Self-blame, a toxic effect of a troubled 18-year factor, is often the basis for a self-limiting belief system children carry from their traumatic experiences into adulthood. Continue reading

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