Sociologist Andrew Cherlin of Johns Hopkins University suggested that the majority of divorces occur within 10 years of the time of marriage because “most people who are unhappily married figure that out quickly.”
There’s typically more to divorce decisions than happiness, but there is little doubt that our culture has elevated personal happiness to an unrealistic and deeply misguided level of importance. This likely contributes significantly to the pervasive reality of divorce.
Faulty expectations for gregariousness can make life a miserable story. It takes maturity to understand and grow through struggle, sadness, disappointment and hardship. Here’s a simple fact: Marriage is not supposed to make you happy; it’s meant to make you married.
Marriage is not about a feeling of love but an agreement to love. It takes work for marriage to work. Many marriages would improve if husbands and wives placed a greater value on the role of commitment reflected in their wedding vows.
“Commitment is having a long-term view of marriage that helps us not get overwhelmed by the problems and challenges day-to-day. When there is high commitment in a relationship, we feel safer and are willing to give more for the relationship to succeed” (Dr. William H. Doherty).
Consider 5 commitments for a good marriage.